As I read the last two chapters of the Book of Ether during the last few weeks, it struck me that one of the many dangers this section of scripture warns us against is that of partisanship. We see a division forming in Ether 14:19-20, where the people began to create two factions: one following Shiz and the other following Coriantumr. The language suggests but does not state explicitly that everyone belonged to one of these two groups. After a period of warfare, Coriantumr realized that two million people had already died and began to hope for a change. He wrote to Shiz, asking that they conclude the war. Shiz said that he'd stop the war if Coriantumr gave himself up for execution. Either way, it seems from v. 6 that the people were too riled up to stop fighting. The same interaction, more or less, repeats itself after more fighting.
While there is value in learning from negative examples, there is a positive example in this same portion of the Book of Mormon. It's mentioned briefly and without fanfare and it's easy to miss: In the first chapter of his book, Moroni explains that he is writing more than he thought he would for the benefit of the Lamanites. Remember that the Lamanites are the people who killed all of his family and friends. In a single day, the Lamanites killed 230,000 of his people, leaving only 24 alive. Despite their crimes against him and his people, Moroni recognized that the Lamanites were his brothers and sisters (in fact, he says so explicitly in verse 4). He also recognized that the only way forward for any of them was to accept the grace and the justice of Jesus Christ. It was not up to him to hold a grudge or even to insist on fair treatment; he had been treated unfairly and no amount of sackcloth and ashes (which were not forthcoming from the Lamanites of the time, as far as we know) would bring back his murdered people. And so he chose to work to record important doctrines in the hope that these people would accept Christ's gospel and choose to live by it.
We all have a choice like Moroni's. We have all been wronged in one way or another. For most or all of us, some of those wrongs were even intentional. We can choose to fight back, as Ether described in his record, or we can choose to emulate Moroni in forgiving and working to bless those who have wronged us. While we should not enable abusive relationships, we would all do well to consider if there is someone we can forgive. And if there is someone we can forgive or have forgiven, we would also do well to consider if there is any service we can offer them that will bring them closer to Jesus and, as a result, to the joy that He offers us all.