Wednesday, May 25, 2011

I sense much fear in you

While at my social dance group last night, I stopped to talk with a friend. In essence, she mentioned my lack of fear. To make her point, she observed that I am capable of performing an interpretive dance in front of my peers. She said so because she's seen it happen. I offered to talk to the DJ to give her the chance to do the same. Wide-eyed, she declined. I suppose that my exploits make me look fearless; after all, dancing strangely in front of one's peers can have unfortunate social consequences.
I think that I appear fearless because I'm willing to take uncommon risks: performing in front of people, stepping up in group situations, taking a long shot on asking someone out, and so on. But the more I think about my behavior and motives, the more I see fear lurking inside.
It isn't that I don't feel fear;